It was a very long day but a very happy one. It all started at 9 in da morning wif mom shoving me in a PTU*, somefing I really don't like. Den, yup, off to we TED**. I'm purrty healthy. I wayed in at, and dis is mom's word, a wopping 21 pounds 11 ounces. Dat would explain all da grunting when she was carrying da PTU wif me in it. After dat we went on a really long drive to a really scary place. We hadda drive around and around, den mom parked da van and gots me out. She kept telling me what was going on but I was still, well, a little bit scared. I hadded my first ride in a elebator. Da doors opened and a ladies voice said "going down" and mom stepped into it and set me down...man dat made my tummy feel funny but I din't frow up or anything. Den we walked, and walked, 'til we gots to a big desk wif a bunch of nice ladies and mens sitting behind it. Dey all gots up and came to see me and tell me how cute I was. Oh, and we were right in front of some doors dat kept sliding open when people came in and da breeze blowed into my PTU and felt nice. I said "mow, merow mew mrow ma meew" which yoo will recognize as "please, can we keep dat open". Den, a man in a uniform wif a radio came, he gots mom a cart to put me on 'cuz we hadded a longer walk and she was kinda getting sore arms from carrying me. So, we walked and walked some more and lots of beans made mom stop so dey could look at me. It was kinda weerd 'cuz dey was all dressed sorta da same (mom sez dem kinda clothes is called scrubs) and some of dem hadded on white coats but it was not cold so I don't know why dey was wearing dem. Finally we gots to another desk wif lots of beans waiting fur us. Yoo know what, I think dey thawt I was some kinda celebrity cat 'cuz da man in da uniform kept saying into da radio "at PT 8" "at NP 14" den he said "just rounded into NT" just afore we gots to dat desk. So, der was a really nice lady dat took us into a room AND DER WAS MY DADDY! I started making my happy skweeky noizes and daddy sed "there's my guy" and mom opened da PTU and I jumped on da bed where my daddy was sitting up and climbed onto him and rubbed my speshul stink all over him so if der were any other cats der dey would know dat he belongs to me. Den I gots to give him some of my speshul "kisses". Yoo know, where yoo rub yoor lips on der face until dey start makeing dem spitty noizes. After alla dat I was kinda tired but der's not enuff room fur two big guys in one of dem little hopspittal beds so I jumped onto a little chair next to daddy dat mom had put my Gizzy Kwilt on and curled up fur a nap. Mom gots permission to lower da "rail" so daddy could reach me and he started giving me a nice massage in da chair and, I hate to admit dis, I drooled in my sleep! Da ladies in scrubs all thawt dat was purrty cute. Dey even found a little bowl so I could get a drink of water and one of da guys mom called a sturjun, oh, surjun brawt some treats fur me. Dey was da good kind, TEM-TAY-SHUNS! He told mom he haf four kitties at home and dey is all real brofurs and sisfurs and da mom cat. We was only suppose to stay fur an hour but dat surjun guy said to let me stay a little longer 'cuz I was a good boy and good medi-sin fur my daddy...just so yoo know, I am a real cat and not a pill! I told him dat too! Den it was time to go, I gave my daddy a last kissy and we reversed da whole stupid trip but skipped da TED part and when we gots home I ran to tell my sisfurs about it. Mom sed I sounded like a flock of seagulls yakking away wif dem. So, dat was my big day. Mom went back to daddy but at least now I know where she is going when she leaves us alone all day and haf da night. Oh, and she sed dat last night der were lots of new pashents on da floor whining and in pain and constantly calling fur da nurses so she hadda do da bed pan and butt washing stuff or dad woulda hadda wait furever fur someone to help. She sed she really loves der lilac colored gloves, what ever...dat woman is crazy! She's hoping dat purrty soon daddy will be able to get up and go potty on his own and den she can be home and get some more stuff done. Like da dishes dat is just stacked in da sink and washing stuff and vacuuming, she sez our carpet looks like it's made of cat fur. We say, what's wrong wif dat, cat fur carpeting is furry comfurtabul!
*PTU-Prisoner Transport Unit, usually a carrier of some kind
**TED-The Evil Doctor, a vet. Da person dat skweezes, pokes and shoots us!