Dad has been giving mom a hard time... Saturday afternoon he started bleeding (all over da living room carpet) and it wouldn't stop so dey ended up at da merjensee room. Dey was der fur 5 hours, turns out dad was "leaking" from da hernia repair and all dat blood was just pooling (like a giant bruze) and finally it opened a hole and leaked out. Dey did a CAT scan to make sure dat der was no other spots bleeding. Nope, dis is a leek he prolly cawzed when he was yelling at mom about how da grass was shaggy and da bushes needed trimming and dat dey will never be able to get da house painted cuz she don't gots a job. Now dat dad doesn't haf inshurints dey will prolly hafta empty one of der savings accounts to pay fur dis. Den yesserday mom had flu like simptums and a killer hedake and all dad did was keep yelling about how slow his innernets was, heck, we haffent even been on da innernets 'cept fur a couple a minits a day cuz of all da other stuff dat mom hasta do. See, dad haf a prollem wif infekshuns and he gets what's called carb unkles ::what? oh, thanks Zippy:: dey is carbuncles, and den dey fill up and den dey open and den mom hasta wash stuff cuz dad leaked icky stuff all over. Dad must haf da cleanest bed in da whole city cuz mom hafta change da bedding and wash da pillows like every other day. And she takes care of all da bandage changing and wound cleansing and house cleaning and laundry and yard work and of course us. Tho we'z kinda been getting da short end of dat stick. No more half hour brushing/masawje seshuns just a kwik furminashun and dats it. Heck, even da butt washes haf gotten to be kwik things just to get da poo offa me. If she gots a job now she would prolly die...or dad would, cuz der is no way he can take care of himself. Mom sez if yoo want to make a fortune yoo should invest in da aspirin company, she is using lots of it. We is sorry to be whining like dis...to make up fur it here is a piksher of me cleaning myself, I'm real cute...
